2014: A New Chapter

For those of you that do not already know I am a major bookworm.  I am usually reading at least 3-4 books all at the same time and they vary from Christian books to Stephen King and everything in between.  I am a huge history buff especially when it comes to the 1960's (thanks Dad!) and pretty much read anything about the Beatles, JFK, Vietnam, and the Civil Rights movement.  It amazes me how so much was going on at one point in time but that's a whole other blog post in itself! ;)

I say all of this about my bookwormness (is that a word???) because that is how I view my life...in chapters.  I have my childhood which is Chapter 1.  Then Chapter 2 is when my parents went through their divorce which was when I was 11.  Chapter 3 was those oh-so-fun teenage years, 4 was my first marriage and becoming my mom and of course Chapter 5 started April 20th when I married my LouLou. Granted there are sub-chapters in each major chapter and many of those sub-chapters begin January 1st.

Photo Credit

It's something about a new year that makes you reflect over the past year and celebrate the accomplishments and mourn the things that didn't go your way and people you've lost.  I am blessed to say that this year I have not lost anyone close to me.  My grandmother is not doing great so I have a feeling that 2014 I will not be able to say the same but for 2013 all my family and close friends are still here with me.  I have put another year in at my job and actually was promoted this year!  I married my best friend, paid off my car, and am on a path to being debt free very soon.

This year also brought some very hard things too.  The effects of my hysterectomy are almost too much to bear which is why I haven't been on here that much.

Since I last posted I have ballooned 25 pounds and this is without changing anything.  I've read a lot about it and apparently this is a thing but I hate it.  I have been beating myself up about it but it is what it is and I have to accept that I am starting 2014 almost 50lbs overweight.  It's also still a struggle that I will never have kids again.  I didn't realize how much having more kids meant to me until I was told I couldn't.  I struggle with it pretty much every day and pray with time that my wounds will heal.  I just hug the two little rugrats I have and enjoy the heck out of them!

I have also been working a TON of overtime which leaves little room for anything else but thank goodness our new guy starts next week which will help take some pressure off of me.

Photo Credit

I have high hopes for this next year.  I don't want to say 'resolutions' because that seems to jinx it somehow but my goals for this next year is to:

---->  Get back in the 130's!!
---->  Blog more! ;)
---->  Go back to school!
---->  Look more into figure competitions (one of my secret dreams)

I haven't decided if I want to focus more on a certification or go back for a degree but I am going to go back to some type of school.  I really want to focus on nutrition and would love to finally get my PT certification.  I have always wanted to compete in a figure competition but have been so chicken but I am hoping by the end of 2014 I can say that I've either competed or I am prepping for my first show.

Just saying a few of my goals gets me so pumped!!  This year is going to be awesome and I am so glad I am starting the new year with you guys!

See in you in 2014!!! xoxo

0

Cooking To Keep Warm

It's officially winter in the metroplex!  I personally am not a fan of the cold which is the biggest reason I have never even considered moving up north.  Weather like "Icepocalypse 2013" as its quickly becoming known in these parts makes me even more thankful that I don't have to deal with this kind of cold too often. 

 

This is a shot of my front yard.  We really should have raked those leaves before this storm came through.  L is really not looking forward to the thaw. 

I got brave and made it to the corner of the house.  I only almost fell twice. ;)  As I'm taking these pictures a few idiots go speeding down the street.  Some people really do not have any consideration for themselves or others.

The kids begged me to go outside and play in the snow.  I tried to explain to them that this is not snow but ice and they weren't having it.  This is them "proving" that we have snow.  Gotta give them credit for persistence. ;) 

******

Anyone who knows me personally knows I hate cooking.  I've never liked it.  I will make every excuse in the book not to cook.  Lately for some reason I've been in the mood to cook.  I think my biggest motivation is when my house is frigid and the only source of warmth comes from the stove. 

I have fallen in love with SkinnyTaste!  Her recipes always look so amazing and I am always adding them to my Pepperplate app on my iPad Air.  I stalk follow her on Instagram and Twitter and have to say that her posts inspire me and make me want to love cooking.

Since we are "iced in" and I am freezing and craving soup I thought I'd try her Cream of Broccoli Soup.

I wish mine looked as pretty as hers but you know what?  Once you take a bite you forget all about the look and get all wrapped up in the taste.  Y-U-M!!!  

I have the most unhealthy family.  My husband and boys are all about anything that doesn't have a fruit or vegetable in it.  When E came in while I was cooking and asked what I was cooking he heard 'broccoli' and bailed.  Figures.  I told everyone they must take one bite and then make their decision.  Husband and my oldest actually ate it and liked it!  My youngest opted for a pb&j instead.  *sigh* Oh well...I tried.

I am SO thankful to Gina for helping me create something that is healthy AND 3 out of 4 people in my family actually like! It's a snow day miracle! :) 

0

Getting Super Shredded!! Goal: April 2014

When L and me got our wedding pictures back we went from happy to mortified.  We had ordered a wedding book with all the best pictures and as we sat there flipping from page to page we both realized one thing: we got fat!  If it wasn't me exclaiming "Ew my chin!" or "Ew my arms!" it was him saying, "What happened to my neck?"  How did this happen?? I can tell you right now what it is:  I married a man that loves to eat...and not just eat but eat OUT!

After my Thanksgiving binge I weighed myself and tears welled up in my eyes.  165.  I haven't seen that number in YEARS.  My highest weight ever was 184 and my plateau when I started losing was 165 so seeing that number scared me big time.  I can't believe I let myself get this bad.  In the three years I've known Louie I have went from 128 (skinny fat) to 165 (flabby fat).  It makes me sad but even more than that it makes me MAD.  I promised myself I would NEVER get back up past 150 and here I am.  Do you know what I do when I get mad???

Natalie Jill Fitness

I get a plan and I get determined!!

I've been following Natalie Jill for awhile and have been wanting to purchase her 12 Week Super Shred but something has always came up so when I received an email about a Black Friday deal I was all over it.

This weekend I have been devouring every piece of information and getting a plan together so I can begin ASAP.  I know my first thing is setting a goal.  Louie and me discussed it and decided April 20, 2014, our one-year anniversary, we are going to hit our goal together and get new pictures taken that we can be proud of.

I also wrote out a contract to keep myself accountable.  I posted it on Instagram earlier and Natalie Jill herself commented on it!!  Talk about motivation!! :)

Something about this time feels different.  Having my husband and Natalie Jill rooting for me helps. ;)  Like Natalie says...

Things don't just happen, You MAKE them happen!

0

'Tis the Season To Be Healthy?

Happy Black Friday!!  I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!  I spent my entire day with family and it was amazing.

My grandparents were able to drive up and see everyone and seeing my grandmother broke my heart.  You can tell how the strokes have aged her.  I told my dad I'm so scared this is the last Thanksgiving with her and he told me he felt the same. :(

Me and my cousin, Tommy

Now that Thanksgiving, and my super sugar binge, is over its time to get back on track!  I have been feeling a bit better this last week but work has been so overwhelming its been hard for me to stay on track as far as eating.  I don't know about you guys but food has always been my problem.  I love smoothies and fresh juices but my juicer is a centrifugal juicer so you need to drink the juice soon after you make it.  I am saving to get a masticating juicer which allows you to juice and have some time before you drink it but good gosh are those buggers expensive!  Thus began a search for a cheaper alternative.

Photo Credit

Hello Nutribullet and thank you Kohl's cash and whomever gave me a Kohl's gift card for a wedding present for making this purchase possible. ;)

I've had a Magic Bullet in the past and used it so much that I blew the motor out.  I have a Ninja blender but I was wanting something I could take with me to work so I could make smoothies there and that Ninja base isn't going anywhere but my kitchen counter.  So my amazing, super analytical husband did some research and found the Nutribullet was probably going to be my best bet.  After a freezing cold trip to Kohl's I came home with this baby.

I made me a kale and apple smoothie for breakfast yesterday and all I can say is...YUM!!!  Awesome purchase and so worth the moolah in my opinion.  I'm about to make my son a carrot and apple smoothie so he can see it in action and get a healthy breakfast at the same time.

I really want to start the holiday season on the right foot and I am SO ready to get this nasty, disgusting flab off my body.  Since I've gotten married I've gained 30lbs.  I blame marital bliss and the hysterectomy but I am so tired of excuses.  I am ready to claim my body back and hopefully having this little gadget is going to get me one step closer.

I hope you and yours had a wonderful Thanksgiving and if any of you are crazy enough to go out today please be safe.  People get crazy this time of year, am I right???

Hahaha!!!  Truth...

0

Cowboys & Romans

I have been a Dallas Cowboys fan since the womb.  I have baby pictures of me in a onesie with a Dallas star right in the middle.  I remember Sundays with a lot of cheering and yelling.  It's all apart of being a true Cowboy fan: you take the good with the bad.  This season we've been taking the bad with the worse but still...you get what I mean. ;)

Photo Credit

Right now the Cowboys are taking on the Giants.  I actually don't hate the Giants so if we lose today (which most likely we will) it won't sting as bad as if they were playing say the Packers (the team I most detest in the NFL).

Photo Credit

Here is an action shot of my man #82.  Love you Jason!!! xoxo

Switching gears here...

 Did you know that my name Christi means "follower of Christ"?

Photo Credit

I haven't talked much about my faith on the blog yet.  Mostly because these past few months have been a very emotional struggle for me and when I get that way I don't like to talk about much of anything.  You know how you go through times when you really feel close to the Lord and other times He seems so far away and anything you do, including praying, is a struggle?  That's been me since the surgery.

Yesterday I found one of the Bible studies I bought before the surgery in hopes that I would have a ton of time to get into God's Word.  I did have the time but my spirit wasn't in it.  It is now.

If you haven't guessed yet I am a Christian, a follower of the Lord Jesus Christ.  For a long time I was ashamed of my faith which is something that is extremely hard for me to admit.  It's never been "cool" to be a Christian but I have to say I am so sick and tired of being a poser.  I am ready to stand for what I believe in and I am going to let my little light shine!

I know there are going to be those haters and that is ok.  I am at an age where I know that you cannot please everyone and after years of exhausting myself trying to I am done!

I am going to start studying the book of Romans which I've been told is a wonderful place to begin when you start truly studying God's Word.  I am really excited to see where the Lord takes me on this journey.

Photo Credit

Stay tuned later for my goals for the week and hopefully some workout pics!  I'm trying to get myself psyched to start training again but my fear of getting hurt is huge and in this freezing weather we're having here talking me out of getting out of my sweats and away from my coffee is going to take a lot of persuading. ;)

0

How I Became A CPhT and Now A Manager

I don't know if I've mentioned this on here yet but I am a CPhT aka a registered pharmacy technician.  I never dreamed of being a tech but when people ask me how I got into the business I tell them it was a total accident.

It was 1998 and I had just quit working at Blockbuster.  I hated that job so much and wanted my next job to be something of worth.  I had been working since I was 15 and fast food, grocery store cashier, and a clerk at Blockbuster was what made up my resume.  I craved to find my passion with graduation and college looming in the horizon.

My boyfriend at the time was a delivery driver for a local pharmacy after school.  He only had to work until 7 and the pay and tips were decent enough.  By this time I was paying for a lot of my things and I definitely did not like the idea of being unemployed but I refused to get another whatever job.  I wanted to find something important and something that could work with my school schedule.

It was about 6pm one Tuesday night when my phone rings and its Boyfriend.

"Hey, what are you doing?"
"Nothing much"
"Want a job?"
"Are you serious?"
"Yes!  Can you be up at my job in a few minutes?"
"...I guess so...What would I be doing?"
"I have no idea but the owner and one of the girls got into a huge fight and we are super busy.  I need to be out on deliveries so can you come up here and answer phones?"
"Sure.  Give me a few minutes."

I remember driving up there not knowing what to expect and shaking as I got out of my car and approached the pharmacy.  By 7pm that night the owner offered me a job and I accepted.  It was perfect for a girl going to school and the pay was $3.00 more an hour than what I had been making at Blockbuster which was awesome!

Back then you didn't have to be licensed to be a pharmacy technician but over the years many of the laws have changed and in my state you not only have to be licensed through the national board (PTCB) but you also have to be licensed through the state.

I have been licensed, lost my license, and now am once again licensed.  If any of you are ever interested in getting into pharmacy let me give you a piece of advise-NEVER let your license lapse for ANY reason.  Keep it up because if you let it lapse and you try to reapply they make you feel like such a criminal.  Just thought I'd throw that in there. ;)

Let me just add that I have NEVER liked pharmacy.  Ever.  I won't go into all the details as to why that is but I will say one thing...it has saved me financially so many times in my life.  I've done every kind of pharmacy you can think of and now I work at a speciality pharmacy which a few weeks ago I had actually debated on quitting until my boss offered me a management position.  That is one thing that I have never had experience in and another awesome thing I can put on my resume but when I accepted the position I had NO idea how much added work I would be putting into it.

My schedule used to be 8-3 and then it was bumped to 8-5 and these past two weeks because we are short-handed I have been working 8-7 at least.  I am exhausted.  I am blessed to have the weekends off but I am usually so exhausted from the week that I spend the weekends playing catch up on sleep!

I've been released to go back to training but right now my question is when?  How do some of the women do it?  I mean, seriously?  I have young children.  I have a husband.  I have a house, a puppy, a FULL time job...where is there time to train?

That's actually my goal for tonight and tomorrow.  I MUST figure this out.  I've thought about getting up at 5am to train but last week I set my alarm and slept through it every single morning.  I am literally that exhausted.  After I get home its cooking dinner and spending time with my family.  After I put the boys to sleep I can hardly keep my eyes open so I usually go to sleep not too long after them.  Then I get up and do it all over again.  Something has to give but what?

Please if there is any woman out there that is able to do it all can you please help me.  I am sending an S.O.S. out there for real!

Sorry for this post being so long but I haven't posted in awhile so I thought I could get away with a long one. ;)

0

I'm Hooked Again

When I helped open our pharmacy back in 2011 it was just me and Layla*.  That first year was a doozy with just the two of us running the place. I look back and wonder how we did it but by Gods grace, and a lot of Starbucks, we did. 

I've always loved coffee. I remember my dad making coffee Saturday mornings and letting my sister and me have a sip. My dad has always made it with a ton of creamer and sugar with just a hint of coffee so naturally that's how I grew up sampling it. 

In college I remember loving coffee shops but boycotted Starbucks. In my click that was the cool thing to do. Throughout the years I went through coffee phases like when I had the boys (after breast-feeding of course) and when I worked at a mail order pharmacy where my day started at 4:00am and ended somewhere late afternoon. Coffee became my life blood and the only thing that kept me sane and functioning many a mornings. 

When Louie and me started dating and trying to lose weight together I decided my favorite sugar-laden beverage had to go. A few months after the pharmacy opened I quit cold turkey. Layla was shocked but I told her it was the health benefits and the money. I love me some Starbucks but good gosh is it expensive! 

Since the hysterectomy I've been craving coffee like no other. I checked some of my favorite health/fitness sites and many bodybuilders blend their morning joe with protein. Genius!!! 

Thus began my experimentation. I tried my Cellucor chocolate and it was too sweet. I'm out of vanilla protein so last week on my way home I stopped at The Vitamin Shoppe and the manager, and fellow coffee fanatic, told me about this. 

I am a huge latte fan (especially vanilla) so when I saw the bottle I was sold. It is delicious!! It's not enough protein for breakfast but it's better than sugar and chemically-laced creamer! 

Now coffee is back in my life and my Keurig and me could not be happier. 😊

Does anyone have any other uses for protein powder? I've read about pancakes so that's probably my next experimentation. Yum!! 

-----

*Name change to protect the privacy of my boss 😉 

0

November Goals

I posted this on my Instagram and Twitter a few days ago and completely forgot to post it here!  My bad! ;) 

So far all I've done is #5.  I have been on a big recipe kick the past few days and even tried a few new recipes today!  They didn't turn out too pretty or I would've taken a picture.  

I do plan on starting the Bible study later this evening and am chugging the water as we speak.  I really can't wait for #3.  ;) 

******

Today is my last day off for my surgery.  I have mixed feelings about going back to work.  I miss the normalcy and the pay but I am really going to miss spending time with my boys.  While I was off my boss called and offered me a management position so starting tomorrow I am going to be a manager!  I'm nervous and excited at the same time.  I've never been a manager before.  :) 

Don't be surprised if you only see sporadic posts.  I'm not sure how my new schedule is going to go and I know its going to take a few weeks to get into a new normal. 

So what are your goals for November?  Leave me a comment and we can help keep each other accountable. :)

0

ISO Love My New Isobag!

L and me have been talking about taking our lunches to work.  I have always been a lunch taker but in the months before my surgery I was carrying several bags to get all of my food to work which got old really quick and L was carrying a small cooler that could barely fit anything.  Needless to say the whole lunch thing went by the wayside and we both became fast food junkies very quick.  

Another problem I have is having zero time to eat at work.  Business has picked up tremendously and time is very precious so the days of me "making" my lunch at work are long gone.  Since I'm going back in a little over a week I need a plan of action so the healthy eating habits I am establishing aren't lost.

Thus began the Google search for what the pros use to carry around the right kinds of eats and we found the Isobag from Isolator Fitness!  It looks small but it can fit so much food!  I can fit my shaker bottle in the side, my supplements in the top zipper part, and it comes with trays that fit in the middle that are BPA free and leak proof!  I haven't had a chance to test out how cold the food stays (that's my goal for next week) which will really make me know if this was a good purchase or not but for the price and all the room it's already worth it.  I do have a refrigerator at work so its not like I can't take out the trays and put them in there.

Let the healthy snacks and lunches commence! One less thing to stress out about going back to work. ;)

0

One Decent Picture

Let me tell you a little something about the love of my life.  He is the most NON photogenic person I have ever met in my entire life.  Sure we all have our gross pics but there is usually at least one where you go, "Ok, that doesn't look too bad!"  Not my man!  Him and the camera are the furthest from BFF's.  I wouldn't say enemies but L just goofs off WAY too much.

Take for instance this little gem from my moms birthday party in June of this year.

I'll be the first to admit that this isn't the best picture of me either but really L? Really?!  We had only been married a few months too.  Pictures like this seriously make you wonder if you made the right decision! LOL (SO kidding...)  

He purposely tries to sabotage every picture he is in and usually succeeds until my dad snapped this sweet picture at my sisters cowboy-themed birthday party this past Saturday. 

Not bad at all even though he still looks like its hard for him not to make a crazy face.  LOL  I love this man so much!  xoxo

I am still hurting pretty bad but I am getting more up and around which is really helping my sanity.  I feel so sorry for the people that have to be bedridden for long periods of time.  I did push myself a bit going to the party on Saturday and on Sunday L and me celebrated 6 months so we went out for a bit and it wiped me out.  The past few days have been rough and now I think I might be coming down with a cold! Oh joy!  

I'm keeping myself busy with a new Bible study, my new Everest app, and doing little things here and there around the house.  It's still nowhere where I want it to be but every little bit helps right?

0

Ever Heard of Everest?

I'll admit that I am an app junkie.  I don't keep a ton of them but I try out pretty much everything that piques my interest.  We had a birthday party on Saturday and didn't get home until after 2am so L and me slept in yesterday and when we woke up we were both on our phones.  I had a few updates so I was in the App store and one of the featured app this week was on called Everest.  After reading the bio it was downloaded and I have been hooked ever since!

This is a screen shot of my main page.  What you do is you have one main goal and that is your "Everest" then you can have other goals which are your "Dreams".  Here are my dreams so far...

There is a community within the app too that lets you see what other people's goals are and you can even select which ones inspire you.  I am happy to say that I've already inspired 5 people!  That makes me so happy. :)

If you haven't checked out the Everest app you should!  If you search "Everest goals" you should find it.  As you can see my Everest right now is "Eating Healthier" and I have already taken several steps including finding a nutrition program that works for me and I started logging again in MyFitnessPal!  Search "Christi Flores" and I will pop right up (my pic is a gorgeous sunrise I took a few months ago) and I would love for you to add me!

Even if you choose not to download the app I'd love to hear what your goals are for this week in the comments. :)

0

I've Been Lucky

There is one thing that I wake up thankful for every single day.  I am proud to say that as of this moment I have not lost a close family member.  I've had great grandparents that have passed which was hard and one of my cousins died in an accident when he was four but it was before I was born.  Right now I still have all my grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, nephews, etc.  I have a feeling that very soon this is going to change.

My dad texted me earlier and told me that my Granny had another stroke.  This will make her 8th stroke of the year, one major and 7 minor.

Why is she having so many strokes?  Because my grandmother has never taken care of herself.  She's smoked since she was 15 years old, never worked out a day in her life, has never eaten healthy, and the only movement she ever did was cooking and when she needed to get up to go to the bathroom or change the channel on the television set.  She is basically killing herself.

Sadly my grandmother and me have never been close though I wish we were.  I think I'm so much like her in a lot of ways that it annoys her for some reason.  She always calls me a "smart a**" and usually gets frustrated when I don't agree with her about something.  She lives a few hours away so we only see each other at holidays but the last few times I've seen her she's not that spit fire I've always loved.  It's like the woman I've always known is disappearing and she is becoming a shell of who she once was. I know my grandmother loves me.  I've only heard her tell me a few times but its one of those unspoken things.

Photo: Zazzle

Seeing her go through this deterioration this past year has made me realize a few things.

#1  It's important to take care of yourself

The whole family used to smoke back in the day but over the past 30+ years everyone has quit with the exception of my grandmother.  She truly loves to smoke.  Period.  We all have told her to quite but she doesn't want to.  She has pretty much given it up slowly this past year but the damage has already been done.  I see what she's going through and know I don't want to be that person.  I want to be in my early 70's and still being up and active like my mom's parents are.

#2  We all have a time limit

I am horrible about not keeping in touch with people.  I tend to let the busyness of my life keep me from things that truly matter.  Times like this are a perfect reminder to keep your priorities straight and remember that no one and nothing is going to last forever.  It's important to make the time to be with the ones you love.

#3  I will always have the memories 

I have so many fond memories of my grandmother.  Oreo cookies and Dimetapp cured any and all ailments.  Pepsi (which I hate) was the only soda my grandparents ever kept in the house.  Memories of weekends at the lake house in Lake Whitney, backyard barbecues, and talks with my grandmother about books or forensic shows (she's a reader and a huge forensic fanatic like me).  Her taking me clothes shopping for no reason and making me feel special.  Just thinking about it all makes me tear up.

No matter if she passes soon or if its years away I will always love her and will always feel lucky I've had all my grandparents this long.

0

I Feel Super! HD Style

Not really feeling too super BUT I am excited to share my newest supplement. :)  

I woke up this morning feeling like I was hit by a bus.  I honestly didn't think the pain was going to last this long but it is still here.  I did push a little more than I probably should have yesterday but you have no idea how tired I am of being down.

Before my surgery this little sweetie was on my doorstep just begging to be tested.  

Photo: Amazon

First off, I'd like to thank Cellucor for coming out with a powder form!  L is a big weenie when it comes to taking pills and some of the supplements in the fit world are pretty big so when HD came out with a powder form it was immediately ordered and on its way.  By the time it showed up on my doorstep I was in prep mode for the surgery which meant no supplements or medication of any kind.  Boo!  I've been waiting until I felt a bit better to give it a shot and since today I feel horrible I thought this might pep me up a bit.

We ordered the peach mango and since I haven't been on supplements in awhile I only put half a scoop in 24oz of water (I'm also trying to get back to my gallon of water a day) and have been slowly sipping on it for the past few minutes.  The taste is wonderful and I am already starting to feel a bit of a pep.  Mission accomplished! :)

I give this a product a big thumbs up and cannot wait to test it out on a workout day.  November 15th cannot get here quick enough for real. 

0

Surgery & Recovery

The Surgery

My mother-in-law flew in Thursday to be with L and me and I am so thankful that she was here.  Thursday night I spent the evening with my wonderful mom buying me comfy pj's and then stopping at my sisters house to meet her newest addition to the family, their new puppy, Sheldon.  I am so glad my mom dragged me out because it didn't give me any time to worry about the surgery, which up until this time I had been doing.  

I got a few hours of sleep and at 4:45am I was in the shower.  My mind was surprisingly calm the entire morning.  We got to the hospital at 5:30am and I was prepped and ready to roll by 6am.  In the back of my mind I was sort of hoping my pregnancy test would come back positive and I could put off this surgery but it came back negative and at 7:00am it was go time.  

I told the anesthesiologist my fears about being put under and how the two times I had been under they had a hard time getting me to wake up.  He was the chief anesthesiologist and assured me that I was going to be fine.  I stayed calm as they wheeled me back to the room and only remember the room being very white and very cold.  

I don't really even remember dropping off but when I woke there was no one around.  I tried to call out but my throat burned so all that came out was a gurgled moan.  The nurse rushed over and announced, "She's awake!"  By her tone I could tell it had taken awhile for me to come out of anesthesia.  I later found out it took four hours for me to come out and even the doctor was becoming quite concerned and had tried several things to get me awake and praise the Lord the last thing worked.  L was a wreck by the time they let him come back to see me.  I could tell by his face that he had been worried.  His eyes were teary and he kissed my forehead.  It was a sweet moment.

Recovery

I was released that afternoon about 2pm and that whole afternoon is a pain pill haze.  Thank goodness my doctor gave me the good stuff because I don't think I could've made that car ride home without a little help. 

Let me just say that I have been in pain for years.  I've learned to deal with it as best as I can so I can say that my pain tolerance is pretty high but good gosh does this hurt!

I've had several visitors and my mom gave me a beautiful card and an angel playing the flute (I used to play once upon a time.  Still love that instrument!) which makes me smile every time I look at it.  We have one of those beds that is adjustable and also vibrates and that has been a God send!  I raise it when I need to eat and can raise or lower it when I get uncomfortable. 

I had my one week check up on Thursday afternoon and the doc said I am healing nicely and walking better than most post-surgery patients.  What he doesn't know was I was pushing myself hard core and cried when I got in the car so full recovery is still a ways away.

Emotionally I still haven't dealt with everything.  I did have a full hysterectomy so I was put on hormones which L is thankful for because the hot flashes and mood swings are in full force.  We will most likely have to adjust my dosage but at this point something is better than nothing.

I will say that I am SO envious of everyone that can still work out.  I will not be able to again until mid-November which seems like forever away.  My eating has been awful with people coming over with fast food to help me out and the scale said I have gained 5lbs since I stopped exercising.  :(  I do feel very discouraged and bawled to L yesterday that I feel like such a failure but I know this is all happening for a reason.  I won't be able to finish the Flavialicious challenge which is a major bummer but I'm sure she will have another one and by that time I will be ready and nothing will stop me!

Until then I rest which surprisingly is one of the hardest things to do. ;) 

0

Ups and Downs

Yes, I've been MIA.

There is no excuse other than busyness and life.

I entered The Best of Flavilicious Workouts Challenge in August and its going pretty well.  I am learning that the biggest key in doing a challenge is the life challenges.  Work has really picked up and since school started I've been getting off at 3 to pick up my boys.  I love that I am getting more time with my kids but the extra time is usually spent fighting the boys on homework.  My oldest is learning that 3rd grade is no joke and homework is a nightly thing!  I'm working on a schedule right now that will hopefully help keep a focus on time and help us all be able to get done what we need to get done.

I love that the Flavilicious challenge tells you what your workout is going to be.  Having that already mapped out is a huge help.  I've put the entire schedule in my calendar so all I have to do is pull up my day and see what I am going to be doing.  Now if I could get a good after school schedule going I will be set!

Another awesome thing about this challenge is it also focuses on your eating.  I've always had a problem with food and with this challenge I am learning SO much!  Right now my main goal is having two servings of vegetables with every snack/meal.  It sounds so easy but its harder than what you think especially when you're only used to getting 1-2 servings of veggies per day.

The Best of Flavalicious Workouts Challenge has been my up lately.

Now my down....

I have my hysterectomy scheduled for October 4th which is right at the halfway point of the challenge so I probably won't be able to finish the fitness part of the challenge.  My plan is to really focus on my clean eats while I'm down and really start to build that habit.

Emotionally I am trying to handle things as best as possible but I'm not going to lie...it's hard.  I really did want another baby but I know that the Lord has a plan for me that gives me hope and a future and I take comfort in that.

I have a little over two weeks until the surgery so until then I am trying to push past the pain and do what I can do.  I know getting fitter will help my recovery time so I am trying to stay as focused as possible.  This weekend has been spent on the couch but I am about to try to fit in a workout and get myself up.

I will try not to make it too long next time.  I need a place to vent and this is a great place to keep me focused on what I need to be focused on. ;)

1

What Is My Motivation?

Why do I want to lose weight?  Why do I want to get in shape?  What is the real reason I want a "perfect" body? 

These are tough questions and frankly I am not sure how to answer them.  I think the answers are buried deep down in my subconscious.

For as long as I can remember my weight has been an issue.  I can remember it fluctuating in junior high when your relationship with your body goes into an awkward phase and me being ashamed of the pudge that would hang over my jeans. 

When I went into high school and summer marching band practice the triple-digit Texas heat made my appetite plummet.  I didn't think much of it and drank water instead of eating.  The next thing I know Mom is crying because I had taken my shirt off to change and she could see my ribs. I was 5'6 and weighed 95lbs.  Without really knowing it I had become anorexic.  I promised Mom I would never starve myself again and instead started eating junk and my weight fluctuated all through high school.

College I was a dancer and was finally in shape and at a healthy weight and looking great until I get into yet another dramatic relationship that sends my weight diving again.  I break off the drama, move back home, vow singleness, got involved in church, and became happy again.  With the happiness came the weight again.  Then it was Todd and the boys and my weight reached its highest peak at 184lbs.  I lost all of that when I went through the separation/divorce and when I met Louie I was 128lbs but I was 'skinny fat'. 

Looking back on my life I have never been fit before.  I don't know if its my fear holding me back or what but even when I was small I wasn't fit.  I am ready to be fit.  I am ready to look in the mirror and see a hard body.  Why?  Because I want to prove to myself that this time I CAN do it!

I also need to realize that my body will never be 'perfect' in my eyes.  There will always be things I do not like about myself but that is part of living in a flawed world.  I really need to work more on my self-esteem and see myself for how Christ sees me.  I am beautiful in His eyes. I am His amazing creation and it is my responsibility to take the best care of myself possible.

I have a lot to think about as far as what my motivation is but this is a good start. :)

0

New Challenge

Tomorrow starts the official Full-body-licious 12 week challenge!!

I'm pretty excited considering the fact that I need some mucho motivation right now.  I'm not sure what has been wrong with me lately but my consistency has been awful!  BUT there is nothing like a good challenge that will help you get your head back in the game.

Nutrition is my biggest struggle right now so this week my focus is to get every workout done on the beginner level which is to go through each set once and to plan my meals as best as I can.  Tomorrow is going to be a struggle since we really don't have much food in the house and both L and me had zilch for motivation to do anything so I am going to have to wing it and make the best choices that I can.  Hopefully by this time next week I will be a meal planning whiz!

Meal planning has always been my downfall.  I've studied about macros but for some reason it still confuses me so I am going to track everything in MyFitnessPal and have them show me where I fall short.

I am starting the challenge the same weight I have been for the past few weeks: 154 but my goal is by the end of the challenge to be in the 130's and having some muscle!  

Here's to a new challenge and new beginnings!!! 

0

A New Goodie & My Plan For This Week

Pic courtesy of accessories.androidxiphone.com

Look what my man bought me today!!!  What I love about it is that I put my phone in it with the case on  it!!  I've been doing a little research trying to find one that will do that but they are harder than you'd think.  We got this one for $30 at Fry's.  Not a bad investment if I don't have to fuss with my phone which is exactly what I did every time I went to the gym last week.  I need the least amount of distractions.

The only downside is I can't look at my workouts like I was.  This also doesn't have to be a bad thing. I see people with notebooks everywhere so maybe I need to dig out a notebook and write out my workouts in there?  My problem is remembering how the moves look.  Maybe I can print out the pictures, cut them out, and put them in a spiral and take that to the gym?  That's a possibility...

the plan

Sunday

Sunday's are my off day and believe me I am ENJOYING it!  I am spending time with my wonderful husband, blessing my house, and planning my week.  It doesn't get much better than this.

Monday

Flavalicious Tight & Trim Thighs

Tuesday

Flavalicious Showoff Stomach

Wednesday

Flavalicous Booty Booster

Thursday

10k Treadmill Training

Friday

Flavalicous Sleek & Shapely Shoulders

Saturday

Flavalicious Beautiful Backside

I am going to try to get up at 5am and do my workouts and then hit the gym after work to finish it up that way I can finish the workout.  Last week I struggled with getting my workouts finished in the time I had so hopefully doing a part of my workout in the morning will help.  I am definitely in the trial and error phase of my Flavalicious program and getting back into the fitness thing but I know that planning is a big step.

I am going to DO this!!!

0

June 9th Mesurements

My favorite time of the week though I think this week is going to be disappointing...

Height: 5'7

Weight: 160.4lbs

Body Fat: 45.2lbs

Body Fat Percentage: 28.2%

Water: 52.4%

BMI: 25.1

My weight is down but my body fat is up by 1%.  No bueno!!  I am using this to fuel my fire. :) Next week I WILL be down on my percentage!

0

Discouragement

I know this to be true and yet here I am being lazy.  Thursdays are OFF days on the Flavalicious program and so are Sundays.  I took Thursday off but then yesterday we made plans to pick up my stuff from a friends and then today I got super tired and ended up taking a 4 hours nap.

I have also gained 3lbs this week even though I've been trying to focus more of my food and have worked out Sunday-Wednesday (though a few of those workouts were pretty sad).  I haven't been making the best food choices and I know that this and the sad workouts have produced the gain.

The pic is so right...I MUST do the work to see the results!  I am tired of being full of excuses.  It's always the same sob story.  Nothing is going to change if I keep this negativity.  It's time for a change.  It's time to focus and figure out what its going to take for a change that is going to last.  Its time to get to the heart of the matter.

0

From Migraine to Flavalicious

Since I last wrote I've had a sick migraine that has knocked me on my tush!  Since I've been down I've had some time on my laptop and more time to check out the Flavilicious programs.   I decided since there is a money-back guarantee I would give the Full-Body-Licious program a go and have spent the entire day downloading all the information and reading about it.  I must say it is hard core!  What I love is that they have home workouts and gym workouts that way there are no excuses for missing a workout!  I also purchased the nutrition program but I haven't had a chance to check that out yet.

I'm excited!!  It doesn't feel has convoluted as the LiveFit program.  There are PDFs and videos for my visual side so I KNOW I am going to succeed.  She said that many women lose 2% body fat a week!  How awesome would that be?!!

OK, I'm off to read some more and will be back to report on my first Flavalicious workout!

0

LiveFit Bummer

Today started off with such promise.  I woke up feeling good, was on top of things throughout the morning  got to work early, and then the hunger began.  My stomach has been bloated and it seems to be getting worse so I made a decision today: NO MORE BIRTH CONTROL!  At least not until Dr. Andrew's gets my test results back and then I will have them switch me to something else that doesn't cause me to bloat and swell like I've been doing.

Mistake #1: Instead of my Advocare Meal Replacement shake I had instant oatmeal (Great Value at that!) and some peanut butter with a gala apple.  Definitely more calories than the shake but I thought it would satisfy me for longer.  Wrong!

Mistake #2: My co-worker didn't bring her lunch so she had her husband stop at a place and get her some Vietnamese soup.  There was quite a bit left over so she asked if I wanted some.  I said sure and man was it delish!  The problem was that after I ate it I had the worst craving for sugar and I got a Butterfinger.  I've went days without even craving one but I guess the noodles were a trigger?  I'm still trying to figure all this nutrition stuff out.

Mistake #3: My other co-worker came for a few hours to make calls so I decided to eat lunch early since she was there and could help out while I was gone.  This was at 12:30pm when I'm used to eating about 1:30pm so my eating was thrown off.  This led to me getting the shakes right at 5pm and devouring a pack of BelVida graham crackers, a large pear, and a Snickers on my way home.

My workout was horrible because first Sissy Poo called and then Daddy-O shortly after so I was focused more on the convo than the workout.  I never get to talk to my Sissy anymore so I couldn't tell her no!

I started the Jamie Eason LiveFit program on BB but I'm not sure if it fits me yet.  I did do most of the moves tonight and really don't feel like I got a workout at all. :(

Dinner was a loaded salad and after L said something that hurt my feelings about a cup of Cheez-Its and 1/2 cup of Blue Bell Cookies & Cream ice cream.  Can we say emotional eating?!!

So yea I'm bummed but that's what's so great about a day.  You can end the pout fest right now, close your eyes, and when you open them again you have grace...a new beginning and a new day to prove to yourself that this day is different and YES you can do it!

L told me he liked going to the gym with me tonight so we are going to meet up again tomorrow night after I drop off the boys with their dad.  He said he doesn't want to work out with me but he likes being able to look up at the gym and see me there.  So sweet. :)

OK, its time to close my eyes...

0

First Day Back

Tonight was my first day back to the gym and I have to say that it did feel different in a familiar way.  I didn't have time to find a good plan on bodybuilding.com so I decided to do the stairmaster and follow up with some push-ups.

I did not realize working out with hypertension was going to be so different but it is.  I am pretty paranoid so when I started to get a little dizzy I backed off quite a bit.  I still managed to burn over 300 calores and I did 5 girlie push-ups.

Today I am celebrating the fact that I did anything!  Something is better than nothing right?

*****

I also noticed today that I am super bloated again.  I was on my blanks (birth control) all last week and started seeing that flat stomach again but Sunday I started my new pack and here it is Tuesday and I am swelled and look preggo again!  Guess who's calling her gyno tomorrow??  I would rather not even be on the pill if it means I wouldn't struggle with my weight as much but I want the doctor to help me out with this.  I weighed in at 154 on Friday and I weighed today and its 158.  There is no way!  I guess we will see what the doctor says but I've already told L we just might have to be extra careful and forgo the pill.  We shall see...

0

Reinstated Baby!!

Something I thought would never be possible happened at 8pm tonight...L and me signed up for a gym membership!!!  I've been an on-again, off-again member at this gym and actually had it suspended so I reinstated it, added L and the kiddos and BAM!  I am back baby!!

When we got home we decided to do a few before pics and OMG are my eyes opened!  Here's the front view...

I am really trying hard not to bash myself right now.  This is so much worse than what I thought!  When L and me started dating I was 128lbs and looking good but being in a happy, healthy relationship I put on a few pounds but I never thought it was this bad.  I have been trying to not be photographed much. ;)

The side view isn't too bad but man look at those thighs!  I am woman is all I can say! LOL

To be positive, I am so loving my new hair color and I still love my smile. :)

...and the back view.  I'm no even going to comment.

So here I am, fat rolls and all.  My shorts are a size small and when I met L were actually a little big on me.  I will get back into these and look fierce!  I do have to say that these pics are very unforgiving but I also know the next time I pick up a candy bar I will think about these pics believe you me!

Tomorrow I am going for an MRI.  I am praying they don't find anything wrong but then again I am hoping something comes out of this testing so I can find out what's been wrong with me.  I plan on hitting the gym after work and am going to start with a Beginner Training Program I found on Bodybuilding.com.

Here's to a new fitness beginning!

0

Destined or Determined?

Where did I get this quote?

This is what I need to remember.  If I am determined I CAN make it happen!!  I can do this!!

0

Faith Faves

Here is a list of some of my favorite websites and blogs that align with my faith.  Be blessed!

Bible Studies

• First 5
• Good Morning Girls (Women Living Well)

Christian Blogs

• Chrystal's Chronicles
• Take Back Your Temple
• True Woman

Christian Ministries

• Insight for Living (Chuck Swindoll)
• Living on the Edge (Chip Ingram)
• The Urban Alternative (Tony Evans)

Christian Women's Ministries

• Going Beyond Ministries (Priscilla Shirer)
• Revive Our Hearts (Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth

If you know of any other blogs or websites not listed here that I would enjoy please comment and let me know.  I am always looking for more ways to support the body of Christ. 

0

If I Told You My Story...

I was always the girl that wanted to do life on her own terms.  Anything anyone ever told me I usually did the opposite.  I've never liked being told what to do.  The one time I should've listened to everyone I didn't.  I ended up on a long, painful journey that almost destroyed me and put me into one of the darkest times of my life.

Prior to 2010, I was a completely different person leading a completely different life.  Maybe one day I will tell my beginning and maybe not.  The past is what it is: in the past and I for one would like to leave it there.  Some of my past is wonderful and I'm sure as time passes I will revisit those tidbits but a lot of it is very painful and there are many things I wish I could forget.

There are two significant milestones prior to 2010 that are worth noting that happened in March 2005 and July 2006.  These months are when God blessed me with my two little miracles, E and DJ.

What is significant is I was always told that I couldn't have children.  From an early age,  I have struggled with "women issues" and was told early on that if I did want to conceive that it would most likely be a painful process.  To spare myself the heartache, I told everyone that I didn't want kids when deep down inside that's all I wanted.  I always wanted to be a mom.  There is not a day that goes by that I do not thank God for these two little miracles.  Motherhood is by far the hardest challenge I've ever had to endure but I wouldn't trade my boys for anything in the world.

Love has also been something that has been a lifelong struggle for me.  By 2010 I had convinced myself that I did not know how to love and would never find someone to share my life with.  I settled into the life of a single mother and had no idea that I was about to meet my soulmate.

In October 2010 while sitting on a friends couch a man walked through the door and into my life.  I didn't know it at the time but I had just met the man I was going to marry.  We quickly became best friends and I found myself falling in love when that was the last thing that I wanted.  I didn't know how to love and I refused to break another heart so for months I fought my feelings.

In April 2011 I finally admitted to my best friend that I loved him and he said that he felt the same way.  I couldn't believe it!  It was so easy!  It wasn't something that was planned.  It wasn't something I tried to force.  It just happened!  It was perfect and it was all God's doing.

Two years later on April 20, 2013, I married my soulmate, my best friend, the man who makes me want to be a better woman.  My L.

Since L came into my life he has given me a passion for believing that with faith and God all things are possible.  He has helped me realize how wrong my thoughts have been up to this point and all the lies I had believed.  He has helped me realize that I have never truly found who I am.  I've always been one of those people pleasers who put aside their own thoughts and passions to make others happy and somewhere along the way I lost who I was.

I started this blog to document my journey to finding who Christi really is.  I want to go deeper in my faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.  I want to be a better wife and mother.  I want to lose weight for good and maybe even find my way in the fitness/nutrition world.  I want to find my passions whatever they may be.  Who knows where this crazy road will take me!

All I know right now is I am glad you're here with me for the ride. :)  Before I did everything my way and I failed miserably.  This time I am doing it all God's way and it is only by grace that I am here.

0

Only By Grace Reviews

Thank you for checking out my reviews!  Since I have started to review more books I decided that my reviews deserved their own home which is why I created...

Only By Grace Reviews

If there is a particular book or category that you're interested in I've included links to all of my reviews here.  Enjoy! 

Categories

Adult Coloring
Autobiography

Bible Study

Christian

Christian Living

Clean Romance

Contemporary

Devotional

Fairy Tales

Fantasy

Fiction
Health

Historical Fiction
Historical Romance
History

Journals

Mystery

Non-Fiction
Personal Growth

Praise Journal

Prayer Journal
Psychology
Religion
Tyndale House Publishing

Young Adult

Books

41 Will Come by Chuck E. Tate

365 Morning Pocket Prayers

Armor of God Bible Study by Priscilla Shirer
Assassination of JFK, The by Robert A. Wagner
Authentic Living by Richard Exley

First Light by Michele Paige Holmes

Four Chambers by Julie Wright

Gratitude: A Prayer and Praise Coloring Journal by Tyndale House Publishing

Heart of the Ocean by Heather B. Moore
In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day by Mark Batterson
Juice Lady's Guide To Fasting, The by Cherie Calbom
King of Average, The by Gary Schwartz
Lay Counseling by Siang-Yang Tan & Eric T. Scalise
No Resting Place by William Humphrey

Open by David Gregory
Reading Romans with Luther by R.J. Grunewald

Searching the Scriptures by Charles R. Swindoll
Summit 8000 by Andrew Lock
Tough As They Come by SSG Travis Mills

Victoria by Daisy Goodwin
With My Eyes Wide Open by Brian "Head" Welch

Proud Member Of:

0