Goodbye September! It's Been Real...

Let me start this post with a disclaimer: if this blog does not make any sense I apologize in advance.  I am extremely sleep deprived. I have been tossing and turning the past three nights and my eyes are black and swollen and my head cannot seem to focus on anything but I figured its the last day of September so I wanted to blog something.  Then I think I'm going to take a much-needed nap. ;)

SparkPeople update:

I didn't jump back in full force like I did the last time I tried to lose weight but I don't think I'm off to that bad of a start.  My focus has been logging in every day, tracking one meal and my water intake, and doing the daily newbie challenge.  So far so good.  I still struggle with my water.  Eight glasses is a breeze for me but I'm going for double that (a gallon a day) and that is more difficult though not completely farfetched.

A few nights ago I was doing good with my water and by the time dinner came I actually wasn't that hungry!  Gotta love the appetite suppressant!!  I'm only weighing once a week but I'm really trying to focus more on how I feel and not on the scale.

With the beginning of the months comes measurements and I will be posting my stats here on the blog.  I'm tired of being ashamed of who I am.  I am Christi and yes I am overweight but I am also on a journey to be my healthiest self.  I'm not perfect and this time I want to document everything I can so one day I can look back and see how far I've came.

Another thing I've realized about myself since starting back on SP is how negative I am about myself.  I am to the point to where I can't even look in the mirror I feel so ashamed.  Not cool.  So while I am trying to work out more and watch what I eat I am also on an emotional journey to love and accept who I am right where I'm at in my life now.  Honestly I think that's going to be the hardest part in all of this.

Job Update:

No I am still unemployed as far as being out in the workforce but you better believe I have kept myself busy.  My house is a lot more in order and I have been decluttering things that should've been done ages ago.

I was hired to do a small temp job here this next week.  The pay isn't great but the company is!  I'm actually going to help my mom declutter her house.  I know some people would cringe at the idea but I love it!  I am a total nerd when it comes to organizing.  Honestly if I could get a job doing that I would be in heaven but sadly there either isn't much of a demand or I'm not looking in the right places.

What's crazy to me is I'm 34 years old and I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

There are so many things that sound awesome in theory but when I do more research into the job itself I realize its not for me.  Everything I really want to do either requires a lot of school, the pay isn't great, or both.  I'm still praying about it all and know that God will lead me to where He wants me to be so no worries.

Me Update:

What about me?  I'm hanging in there and taking things day by day.  All of this has really brought my depression back full force which has been tough.  Some days are better than others of course and so I am thankful for the good days and just try to press through the bad ones.

Here's one thing I've been doing every morning that I look forward to every day.

Quiet time in the Word and a cup of coffee.  I feel so lucky that I get to do this every morning.  I have been having more of a hunger to know God's Word on a deeper level so I pulled out a book my grandmother gave me a few years back How to Study Your Bible by Kay Arthur and am trying to learn the Inductive approach.  It's definitely a work in progress but I hope one day to share what God has revealed to me through this rich study.

This week two of my long time best friends came by to visit me and it really revived me.  When the going gets tough you really realize who your friends are (and that's all I'm going to say about that).  I love these girls so much and really need to start making more time for them.

One thing that stinks about being an adult is not having time for your friends like you used to.  What's so great about these two women is that months could go by without us talking or seeing each other but we all love each other and are there when we are really needed.  I'm really blessed to call them friends.

OK its nap time for real! LOL Happy last day of September!!!

No comments

Thank you so much for stopping by! xo

Back to Top